Define Undefined

One feeling a person having a mid-life crisis may have is wanting to search for an undefined dream or goal. This leaves me a little confused as to how you can search for an undefined dream or goal.

I'm wondering if it's that feeling like a toddler gets like, "I don't know what I want but I want it now." I guess I'm experiencing that right now another symptom I can check off. I'm trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. I was actually hoping to not grow up but since I have to....I guess this is how crazy old ladies are made.

I don't have any college behind me. I have a friend who is about 50 and she is going to college to become a Physicians Assistant. They wouldn't give her any college credit from when she was young and she was so disappointed because she was close to finishing when she got married. I think that's a little unfair to not get credit for college you completed when you were young. That's when our memories were at their peak. I can remember stuff from my early twenties. It's what I did yesterday that I can't remember.

I finally decided I would get some schooling in and try and sharpen my senses. I hope to start in the next couple of weeks. From what I heard I probably won't be the oldest person there. It's just when I was young, I was an aspiring rich housewife. Well, like a rock star wannabe, I finally decided I should probably have a back up plan. Though I was a housewife and doing okay, I haven't been the "rich" housewife. What's the use of staying at home if you can't afford to go to lunch and shop all day?

I was really hoping to be at a more comfortable place financially at my age. And I guess we are. We upgraded neighborhoods a couple of years ago and plan on dying in this house unless we decide to move to Phoenix when we retire. There are a lot of people our age in this neighborhood, so it's perfect. Our whole neighborhood will be dropping like flies at the same time. Maybe we can get a group rate for the funeral costs.

Anyway, back to dreams and goals and being undefined. It's not that I've never had any, there's just so many to choose from. But I guess it's kind of like marriage, you eventually have to choose just one. And then you gotta get pretty good at it, knowing all the idiosyncracies to make it work and be successful. Nothing like investing time into a career to only find out it picks his nose and has flatulence.